I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
They took my balls.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Randomize
