Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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