i think my tv is drunk
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
