Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
