are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize