the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize
