i need an iv and a liver transplant
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
this will be a night to untag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize