How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
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