just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize