i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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