when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
