I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
