I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
