Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
