I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
