garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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