Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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