yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I deserve this hangover.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
