I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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