I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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