Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
