Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize