Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
