Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
