In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Randomize
