i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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