I must be too annoying 4 u.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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