the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I look better un-naked...
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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