I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
