Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
