Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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