i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize