btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
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