I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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