My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Randomize