I'm eating all of the evidence.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
