Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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