Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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