Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize