the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
