somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
