If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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