remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
