I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
They took my balls.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
