i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
