You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.