Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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