i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You're breaking my sexual little heart
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
please don't ironically join a cult
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