He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
