she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
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HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
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Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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