I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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