Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
