it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
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Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
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Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
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