The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize